What’s the biggest complaint about the music industry today? Itunes destroying physical CDs? Watching all the genres mesh together? Youtube banning an...
Music Aint what it used to be
May 1, 2014
Where’s My Grammy?
May 2, 2014
Nicole Scherzinger. That name didn’t ring any bells for me when I read it in headlines in March of 2013. She was referenced later in the article as one of the singers of the Pussycat Dolls and I said, “Oh” in fascination. The Pussycat Dolls are the center of musical genius, so whatever Miss Scherzinger has to say is significant.
Regarding significant things, let me first discuss something very significant to the industry: Boobs. I’m sure all our male and lesbian fans are cheering from behind the computer screen, “Yeah!” Sorry loves but I’m sick of seeing boobage, cleavage, thigh, skin, and butts in the music industry. Boobs are significant, of course, but only because they’re taking over the world. Or at least the media. That and Gaga’s golden wheelchair.
Back to Miss Scherzinger. As I read an interview of hers, my brain short circuited. Ever been in that situation where someone says something so stupid you literally have no reaction? Here, let me show you what she said:
"I come from the most religious family - my grandfather is a priest - and if they support me in all this, and they do, then I'm okay. I'm being sassy and classy; I'm having fun….to be honest with you, I sometimes wish I were more slutty. I’d probably be a lot more successful if I were. This is such a tough industry, you know. To make it, you really have to sell your soul to the devil. I haven’t. That’s probably why I haven’t quite reached the top of my mountain. I mean, where’s my Tony Award, my Grammy, my Oscar? Why don’t I have any of those things yet?”
The former Pussycat Dolls singer went on to suggested that her talent may have come from a higher power.
"Maybe it was God's will. I just knew that it was going to happen. The moment I heard Whitney Houston sing, I realized that that was what I was going to do as well.”
Oh dear, where to begin. You wish you were sluttier yet you think you’re being sassy and classy? Do they even make classy sluts? Dear friend, if you think being sluttier would make you more successful, you’re probably right. But you’d lose all sense of respect from your peers and probably a portion of your fans. So don’t pretend like you’re being classy, because a classy woman garners respect. Also, I don’t know when the last time you checked, but being slutty isn’t a prerequisite for a Grammy. Your boobs don’t win Grammys, your talent does.
No one is “owed” a Grammy. You are owed a lifeguarding certificate if you complete the training course. You are owed a college degree if you complete all the requirements successfully. You are owed auto insurance if you pay your monthly bill. But there’s no way in hell that anyone is ever owed a Grammy. That’s why it’s called an AWARD. Unlike in college, there’s no criteria to fulfill. It doesn’t matter how many albums you’ve sold or how many fans you have. The Grammys are looking for talent, which doesn’t really cover the realm of sluttiness.
I also find it amusing that she claims she should have been sluttier to help her career, and then later says it was the will of God to become successful. So, we have two opposing things to credit you for your career. Sex moves and God. Fantastic. I’m glad for you.
Excuse me, Miss Scherzinger, but I’ve wasted too much time writing about my reaction to your silly words. I’ve got to go do something substantial and practice guitar now.